Oh BOY!

So funny...

I had just decided to take a work break to blog about my waiting as patiently as possible to find out if Tim and Kerri are having a boy or girl...

Wouldn't you know as soon as i was starting to type i heard *beep, beep, beep* and it was THE text message I've been waiting for!!!

IT'S A BOY!!!

I'm so happy for them. Nate and I had a feeling it was going to be a mini-Timmy in there.

We love him already...and so does Reese, which will make the arranged marriage much easier 25 years from now :)

They said it would get easier...

Before i went back to work i did whatever i could to "prep" for how i was going to feel, act and behave as a result of this big change. Quite frankly, i was a complete mess leading up to going back to work. I reached out to close friends...and those who weren't necessarily "good" friends, but fellow mommies nonetheless, who were more then willing to email me back, or reach out, just to talk about their experience and lend advice and insight.

The general theme of all of these conversations and/or email exchanges: It will get easier.

Not. Really.

A strange thing seems to be happening for me. Although my first day back was very hard - seeing Nate drive off with Reese, knowing i wasn't going to hear her playing in the house, or napping upstairs - i did what i thought was pretty damn good. And the day after that, and the day after that. In fact, i kept saying to myself, "Shit...look at me go! I'm not crying or anything." Sure i would think about her ALL day long, and i would feel sad, but i feel good about who's taking care of her and when i go to pick her she's so happy that i makes me feel even more confident about my decision.

Now, almost three weeks later, it's getting harder. I feel sad more often throughout the day when i think about her. I constantly wonder what she's doing, if she's making new noises, getting closer to crawling while playing on the floor, and hardest yet, if she's thinking to herself "Where's my Mommy?" Uh. Talk about driving a knife through my heart.

I was just sitting on the floor with her this evening just watching her play and i couldn't help but realize how much she's changing - and how fast it's happening. While it's all so exciting to see, i can't help but think that I'm really not seeing all of it as it's happening. Nope. That's what my babysitter gets to do now.

So, while i am really proud of myself for being back at work, and being able to say that i too provide for my daughter, i can't help but feel like "they" lied.

It doesn't get easier.

Gold Diggers

I might give off the wrong impression with this one, but the following is a glance of what any one work day at the office can look like for me. It's also a little something i like to think of as a damn good reason why some women either become - or are just born to be - gold diggers:

5:30 a.m. - Wake up/Shower/Makeup
6:00 a.m. - Feed Reese/Check crackberry
6:15 a.m. - Find something to keep Reese busy so i can blow dry my hair
6:30 a.m. - Wake Nathan up (usually for the 3rd time); Savor every drop of Foldgers in my cup
7:00 a.m. - Get dressed/Check crackberry
7:05 a.m. - Get Reese dressed
7:10 a.m. - Make Reese's bottles; Pack Reese's bottle;
7:25 a.m. - Log in to answer emails before i get in the car to drive to the office
7:45 a.m. - Put Reese down for her morning nap
7:50-8:45 a.m. - Back on computer to answer more emails while Reese naps
8:45 a.m. - Get Reese up; Change diaper; load her in car seat; head out the door
8:55 a.m. - Stop for gas
9:00 a.m. - Drop Reese at Kathi's
9:05 - 10:15 - Drive 45 miles/over 1 hour to work; Run through parking lot to get into office for a conference call
10:30 - 11:30 a.m. - 1st conference call
11:30 a.m. - Meeting with co-worker about 2010 planning
12 noon - Break record for consuming chicken salad sandwhich in shortest amount of time
1:00 - 2:00 p.m. - Another conference call - survey planning
2:15 p.m. - Sweet - enough time to pee
2:30- 3:15 p.m. - Another conference call - 2010 planning/training design
3:30 - 4:00 p.m. - Finance "meet and greet"
4:00 - 5:00 p.m. - Conduct interview for open position on team
5:05 p.m. - run upstairs to get my shit
5:10 p.m. - run through parking lot to car
5:15 - 6:30 p.m. - Drive...and drive...and drive home
6:30 pm. - Arrive home to Reese in highchair and Nate cooking
6:35 - 7:00 p.m. Play with Reese
7:00 p.m. - Eat breakfast for dinner (no time for grocery shopping)
7:10 p.m. - Give Reese a bath
7:25 p.m. - Feed Reese
7:45 p.m. - Read Reese her favorite book: I Got Two Dogs
7:50 p.m. - Put Reese to bed
8:00 p.m. - Check emails
9:00 - 10:30 p.m. - Watched "18 Kids and Counting: First Grandduggar" (i know, i know)
10:30 p.m. - BED!


With that, I say:

Rock on Gold diggers, Rock on.

Say Hello to My Little Friend...

Well...i should say Reese's new friend. Yup, that's right. The little Peanut was chalked full o' poop for about a week. Finally, during her 6 month check up I asked the doctor how i can ensure my 6 month old does end up with a hemorrhoid. Enter prune juice!

So i filled her sippy cup with 1 ounce of prune juice and 1 ounce of water...the next day the kid shit 3 times! Who knew that an ounce of prune juice could be so potent? Anyway - she's back in business so to speak. I've still been laying off the rice cereal and bananas which seem to be the culprits.

This weekend was SO busy. We threw a surprise 50th birthday for my mom at our house last night. We converted the garage into a martini bar...it turned out great (pictures to come when I'm not so lazy) and she was 100% surprised. Mission accomplished.

Tonight we went to my Aunt's house because my Uncle Tim is in town from California. It was so nice to see him since it's been so long...so long that i don't even remember the last time we saw him. Perhaps our wedding....or the Christmas right after we got married??? Err....not sure. But you get the point - it's been a while.

OH. Rewind a couple of days. Friday night i found myself at Shoprite at 10:30 p.m. stocking up on all the goods to make food for my Mom's party (i made EVERYTHING). While i was there i decided to paroose the baby food aisle. Like i mentioned in a previous post there are just some things i can't keep up with anymore - and making baby food is one of them. Although I've continued to make some things, I've come to realize that purchasing baby food is SO much easier. Anyway, once i started gazing the shelves for all the delectable choices (slight sarcasm in the word "delectable") i was like a friggen mad woman. Just picture me sweeping my entire arm over each shelf as jars of baby food fly into my cart. I was overwhelmed with the thought of being able to feed my baby without doing any of the work to actually produce the food. I bought so many combinations of flavors, both fruits and vegetables, and found such satisfaction in coming home and stocking my shelves with it all.

There was something so satisfying last night about just opening the lid to the jar and simply feeding Reese. And the best part of it all: I'm totally fine with it. I mean, I'm not going to let this cause me to lose sleep like the whole breastfeeding/formula debacle did. I know it may seem strange that feeding my child Gerber baby food is a relief, but i guess i just had visions of homemade baby food fairies dancing in my head for so long. I was sure that i was going to feel like a failure if i couldn't keep up with making all her food. Well...turns out...i was wrong. And, for once, I'm so happy i was. Her favorite so far seems to be the banana and mango mixed together. She can't get enough!

Tomorrow is Columbus Day - i don't have off but Nathan does, so he and Reese are going to play together all day while i work. It is a Bank of America holiday but not a Merrill Lynch holiday (since our calendar coincides with the Stock Market). Next year we will get it off...but that doesn't do me any good tomorrow, now does it?!?!

Ahhh. Time for Desperate Housewives. My guilty pleasure for the night.

My Little Pumpkin Pie

We went pumpkin picking this weekend! I LOVE the fall...and all the fun things that go along with it. I can definitely say that it's even more fun when you have a little one. The place we went to had a tractor that actually drove us out to the fields where you pick your own pumpkin. SO FUN!

Now it's Monday...and i started off the week by going into the office for the first time. It was a crazy day. I'm exhausted, i can't lie. It's just a long ass drive - and once i arrived i was in meetings back to back for 5 hours and then got back in the car, picked up Reese and came home for more chores and work.

Poor Reese cried all evening. She's constipated so who can blame her? She has her 6 month appointment tomorrow so I'm hoping to get some insight on some methods of relief for her - before her little belly bursts or she pops a blood vessel in her noggin.

To top off what wasn't the best day ever, i sliced the top of my thumb open pretty good while cutting an onion. Ouch.

Off to relax before it all begins again tomorrow.

Goodnight.

Promises, Promises

Here are some pictures I promised!
At her Grammy's 50th birthday dinner!

With Uncle Moe

On her way to Kathi's while Mommy works

Boo!

Ready for Bailey's 1st Birthday (did i post this one already? Mmmm....)

To make or not to make

Baby food that is.

I've been making all of Reese's food so far, but i won't deny that it's time consuming, messy and it looses it's lustre after a while.

Either way I've just chosen to make it so i have "bulk" cubes (i freeze it in ice cube trays) and because i actually kinda enjoy it.

Key word: kinda

Now that I'm back to work, and had to make sweet potatoes for her last night, I'm realizing why some people think I'm nuts for spending the time to do it (this includes my pediatrician). Kathi had mentioned that she thinks maybe Reese would like a veggie with her fruits at lunch. So there i was at 10 p.m. last night making sweet potatoes for her. It actually wasn't that bad - just not what i wanted to do on the night of my first day back to work.

The other reason why making baby food isn't always the "best" idea - not all veggies freeze and reheat that well. Example: yellow squash. I went to heat it up last weekend, pulled it out of the microwave and just thought "i could never give this to my child." It looked like hair gel had been squirted into the baby food bowl. Gross.

So today at Target i bought some of the Gerber Organic baby food - Yellow Squash. I figured if i can't make it and have it be as delicious as squash can taste to a 6 month old i might as well buy it so i can broaden her horizons in the food department. She ate it tonight and loved it!

My point is - if your kid is hungry you have to feed them whether it's homemade or store bought. No matter what you choose they will presumably grow and become stronger from it. Now this really makes me want to get on the formula v. breastfeeding topic but i definitely don't have the energy for that tonight. I will, however, devote an entire post to that sometime soon. Let's just say that my attitude toward that is the same as i stated above with solids...and that's coming from someone who worked her ass off to breastfeed....and still do. I'll stop there for now since I'm already gritting my teeth while resisting the urge to get "into it."

In other news: Reese is 6 months old today! My oh my, how time flies. I took some pictures of her today but haven't loaded them so I'll catch up with pictures over the weekend.

Mmmm...i think that's it for now.

Time to do some laundry and stay awake long enough to catch a new episode of The Office!

That's what she said.